CHICAGO—Comedy legend Bill Murray had people in stitches Tuesday morning when he made an unexpected appearance at Northwestern Memorial Hospital, crashing super-fan Rich Browning’s triple-bypass […]
I am a proud member of the UCLA basketball team, and I respect that COVID-19 is a serious threat to the community. I would never […]
WESTWOOD — After returning from Ralphs today at 12:30 p.m. PST, your roommate assured you that he is definitely going to finish the bananas he […]
BERKELEY — Researchers at the University of California, Berkeley developed a vaccine for the viral Covid-19 at 11 a.m. on Monday, and yet the university […]
ENCINO, CA — The nation reeled Sunday afternoon after learning that area man Chis Peterson really just drank the fuck out of his glass of […]
KYOTO, JAPAN — Today, in a private interview with Enabler correspondents, Nintendo president Shuntaro Furukawa revealed that Nintendo orchestrated the Coronavirus pandemic to increase sales […]
LOS ANGELES — Due to the rapid spread of coronavirus, precautionary measures put in place to combat the virus have only highlighted the sensual nature […]
WESTWOOD — Students passing through Bruin Plaza Tuesday afternoon were met with an impromptu press conference held by a group of local huskies in an […]
JERSEY CITY, NJ — In a groundbreaking new study, a team of geneticists discovered that a set of identical twins, separated at birth, both grew […]
WESTWOOD — The UCLA Office of Equity, Diversity & Inclusion has officially shut down roleplaying club Bodacious Bards’ newest Dungeons and Dragons campaign after students […]
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