
Opinion: I Listened To The Daily Once, And Now I Am Omniscient
Greetings, lesser one. It is I, your neighbor in POLSCI 30, here to inform you of my recent endeavors in the political sphere. Last night, […]
Greetings, lesser one. It is I, your neighbor in POLSCI 30, here to inform you of my recent endeavors in the political sphere. Last night, […]
YOUR NEIGHBOR’S HOUSE — After you complained about the difficulties in your life, your neighbor and local old guy Rutherford McFiddlesticks explained that he may […]
WESTWOOD — After years of appearing only vaguely wild and jungle-like, the UCLA Samueli School of Engineering will finally be building a Rainforest Cafe in […]
WESTWOOD — Long-term student Brody Martin, currently enrolled in his fifteenth quarter, informed his counselor Monday that he is taking a lighter course load this […]
Hey buddy. It’s me, Grog. Yeah, the little turtle by the bridge who saw you walking through the botanical gardens with your date. Oh, you […]
WESTWOOD — Fourth-year history major Elisa Lee, who has zero marketable skills or relevant work experience, has just announced her intention to go to graduate […]
WESTWOOD — Fourth-year Primrose Miller claimed Monday that their depression is just seasonal, despite it being week eight of spring quarter. “I’m usually totally fine. […]
WASHINGTON D.C. — Seeking to expand on the “No Child Left Behind” educational program, Senate Republicans have rolled out “No Child Left Unshot.” “We think […]
It starts with one thing, and I just don’t know why. Sometimes, it doesn’t even matter how hard I try (keep in mind, I didn’t […]
WESTWOOD — ASUCLA announced last Sunday that it is partnering with UniBud to bring students all of their kushy needs, now accessible via their student […]
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