GOP: Democrats Are Worse Than Child Molesters
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Today, in a joint statement on Capitol Hill, several Republican lawmakers confirmed that any member of the Democratic Party is unequivocally and […]
Area Man Most Thankful For Black Friday Steam Sale
WESTWOOD — Despite his loving family, fulfilling career and good health, area man Tobias Yuichi is more thankful for Steam’s annual Black Friday sale than […]
Things To Be Thankful For This Thanksgiving
Still not sure what to be thankful for this Thanksgiving? Don’t worry! The good writers of the Westwood Enabler have you covered. #1 – Our […]
a construct grammar social be
— , WestWOOD, CA knowing grammar this important not is for I am with; if artificial I am – then what. grammar were be! that […]
Op-Ed: Weed Is Life
Weed is life, bro. Like, I don’t mean like it is like, literally life, but it sustains me. Every day I’m out on the porch […]
Hot Kevin From Chem Now Just Mediocre Kevin In Film GE
WESTWOOD — After sharing ten weeks with classmate Kevin in Chemistry 14B, second-year Biology major Marissa Johnson was disappointed to find that the same boy, […]
BREAKING: Thesis Statement Isn’t Actually A Thesis
WESTWOOD — After waiting in anticipation for feedback on the first draft of an essay that comprises 15% of her grade, third-year Human Biology and […]
Area White Woman Would Totally Date Nonwhite Guy, Just Never Had The Opportunity
LOS ANGELES — Area white woman Tracy Jefferson is completely open to dating a nonwhite man, but has never had the opportunity. “I mean, yes, […]
Local FC Barcelona Fan Learns What Catalonia Is
WESTWOOD — Local FC Barcelona supporter and self described “football, not soccer” fanatic Rick Lionsgate was startled to find Barcelona was located in Catalonia, the […]
Five Former Presidents To Form New Boy Band
WASHINGTON, D.C.— After their triumphant showing at the recent Hurricane Relief Benefit Concert, the five living former presidents have decided to take their careers to […]