Opinion: The Westwood Enabler Will Never Be UCLAFits
WESTWOOD — Picture this: you’re a cool UCLA undergraduate, class of 2023. You’re bored. You open Instagram in search of entertainment. Do you go to […]
Student Voices
Opinion: If Ned Fulmer Can Do It, So Will Your Boyfriend
Did you just celebrate your two year anniversary with Sweetie Cakes? Everything’s going well, he bought you flowers and gifts, and promised to love you […]
Opinion: The Anderson School Of Management Should Be Burned Down
WESTWOOD — Last week, I got lost in the Anderson School of Management. It wasn’t my fault! Each building is numbered. And lettered. And it […]
Opinion: The Roebling Block Party Is Needlessly Destructive. Also, I Wasn’t Invited.
WESTWOOD — Students set private property ablaze Thursday night at the quarterly Roebling block party, disturbing the peace for Westwood residents trying to get ahead […]
New UCLA Course On How to Enroll In Courses Fast Enough Locked Immediately
WESTWOOD — Students wiped away tears of joy today as they broke out their laptops and logged into their MyUCLA accounts, waiting for their enrollment […]
Student Offered $1 Million Grant After Sending Professor The Perfect Email
WESTWOOD — Sophomore biology student, Cindy Sheraton, is celebrating the opportunity of a lifetime after receiving the William F. Buckley Memorial Prize for an exceptional […]
Report: Your Neighbor Only Practices Trombone Because He Hates You
WESTWOOD — After careful consideration of the evidence, we’re certain that your neighbor- the one saved in your phone as “Angus from Apartment 216”- only […]
4th Year Philosophy Student Incapable Of Producing Original Thought
WESTWOOD — After years of studying nothing but theory, fourth year Philosophy student Mark Li had to be informed that he was incapable of producing […]
Tasing Yourself In The Hamstring, And Other Bad Study Habits To Get Rid Of Before Finals
Finals are coming up, and there are so many terrible ways to study. To help you become the best version of yourself for finals season, […]
Student-Athletes Spotted Sleeping, Showering In UCLA-Branded Backpacks
WESTWOOD — Reports of student-athletes never taking off their black UCLA backpacks have been on the rise as campus has returned to in-person instruction. “No […]