Local Thrillseeker Jaywalks At De Neve Crosswalk
WESTWOOD–Eager to quench his thirst for adrenaline, area thrillseeker Adam McGrew, a first year global studies major, jaywalked at De Neve crosswalk last Friday. “I […]
Graduating Senior Unknowingly Makes Last New Friend Ever
WESTWOOD—Graduating senior Danielle Rojas unknowingly made her last new friend ever when she befriended fellow student Allison Yang last Thursday. “She’s pretty chill, I guess,” […]
Op-Ed: Wonder Woman Should Smile More
When I first heard that DC was making a Wonder Woman movie, I was skeptical. Some of the best super heroes are men, and […]
Shapiro Fountain Now Just Champagne
WESTWOOD — In the wake of graduation photo shoots, oceanographers confirm that the Shapiro Fountain near Royce Hall is now just flowing with champagne. “There’s […]
Area Douchebag Reminds Trump “Pulling Out” Least Reliable Method
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In the wake of President Donald Trump’s decision to withdraw the United States from the Paris Climate Accords, area douchebag Chad Finberry […]
Western Wall Grabbed By the Crevice
JERUSALEM — On May 22, one of the holiest sites of the Abrahamic religions was allegedly accosted by a visiting tourist with incredibly small hands. […]
Children Playing House Engage In Horrific Custody Battle
WESTWOOD–The playground at Westwood Elementary became the center of tense conflict as second-grader Jenny Katz, playing the role of “Mommy,” and third-grader Ben Quon, playing […]
Local Fraternity Member Finally Grunts Louder Than Club Athlete At Wooden
WESTWOOD–After months of training, UCLA fraternity member Kyle Lewis finally succeeded in grunting louder than that guy on the club baseball team while lifting. “That […]
Report: One-Year-Old Water Bottle Still Not Washed
WESTWOOD—Earlier this week, sources confirmed that third year Environmental Science major Elizabeth Maxwell hasn’t washed her reusable water bottle since she bought it last year. […]
How To Get Out Of That Frat Formal You Agreed To
Someone asked you to a frat formal and you accidentally agreed! Oh, no! Here’s WE’s best tips for getting out of it. Drop out of […]