New Documentary Reveals Existence Of Secret Fourth Beatle
LIVERPOOL — In stunning never-before-seen footage, the new documentary “The Beatles: Get Back” appears to suggest the existence of a previously unknown fourth member of […]
A&E
Uh Oh! You Just Got Invited To An Improv Show
WESTWOOD — Amateur comedians have been bombarding unsuspecting students over the past week with invites to their improv shows, and you are their latest victim. […]
Macy’s Thinks It’s About Time Deadbeat Nordstrom Hosts Parade For Once
NEW YORK CITY — In a statement given Thursday morning, Macy’s reaffirmed its displeasure with having to throw the annual Thanksgiving Day parade, calling upon […]
Hentai Enthusiasts Sue “Squid Game” Creators For False Advertisement
LOS ANGELES — In a suit filed Monday, fans of the Japanese art form known as “hentai” alleged that streaming company Netflix had engaged in […]
Guy Making Jokes In Lecture Chat Releases Netflix Special
WESTWOOD — Third-year psychobiology student Neil Korsch is preparing to release a Netflix stand-up comedy special later this month after his critically acclaimed set in […]
Area Man’s Art Still Sucks Despite Depression Diagnosis
PORTLAND, OR — After several unlucky years spent developing his craft, things were finally starting to look up for local painter Chuck Picasso (no relation) […]
Rudy Giuliani Still Waiting On Text From Maria Bakalova
WASHINGTON, D.C. — After his encounter with actress Maria Bakalova in Borat Subsequent Moviefilm, attorney Rudy Giuliani is still waiting for her to reach out […]
Op-Ed: Women Under 5’6” Should Be Allowed To See Little Women For Free
When I first saw Little Women I was surprised by how big the women were. I quickly got over my shock when I realized that […]
Hands Touching Face Category Added To Pornhub
LOS ANGELES — Due to the rapid spread of coronavirus, precautionary measures put in place to combat the virus have only highlighted the sensual nature […]
Dungeons And Dragons Game Disbanded For Problematic Focus On Race And Class
WESTWOOD — The UCLA Office of Equity, Diversity & Inclusion has officially shut down roleplaying club Bodacious Bards’ newest Dungeons and Dragons campaign after students […]