Ackerman Smoothie Robot Also Striking
ACKERMAN STUDENT UNION — In a unanimous vote, the Ackerman Beverage Kiosk Robotic Arm Union solidified plans for a strike. “I will bring UCLA to […]
ACKERMAN STUDENT UNION — In a unanimous vote, the Ackerman Beverage Kiosk Robotic Arm Union solidified plans for a strike. “I will bring UCLA to […]
WESTWOOD — Due to recent budget cuts, Chancellor Gene Block has begun pushing for a new cost-cutting and productivity-boosting measure: murder. “Even if we shoot […]
WESTWOOD — After months of deliberation, UCLA has decided to halt mechanical repairs on the Inverted Fountain and replace it with a new-and-improved Perverted Fountain. […]
LOS ANGELES — After a full two and a half months, Sarah Myers has officially returned from “Sarah’s Self-Discovery Journey,” yet she did not seem […]
I love October. Changing leaves on every tree, pumpkins on every stoop, and Trader Joe’s butternut squash mac and cheese in every student’s freezer. But […]
VATICAN CITY — On Monday morning, the world’s leading religious scholars announced that Jesus actually had a balayage, contrary to their earlier reports that he […]
Yesterday, I was walking back to campus after enjoying a delicious $15 salad at Tendergreens when a homeless man looked right into my eyes and […]
WESTWOOD — A high school student touring the UCLA campus looks like they would be a better fit for second-rate UC Berkeley. “Usually when I’m […]
Hi there! It’s me, the one who sits next to you in class! I just wanted to let you know that I did actually hear […]
Ring, ring, your mom is calling! Is she just saying hi? Or has something terrible happened to someone that you may or may not remember? […]
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