
Religious Scholars Discover Jesus Had a Balayage
VATICAN CITY — On Monday morning, the world’s leading religious scholars announced that Jesus actually had a balayage, contrary to their earlier reports that he […]
VATICAN CITY — On Monday morning, the world’s leading religious scholars announced that Jesus actually had a balayage, contrary to their earlier reports that he […]
THE 101 — In an inspiring story out of Los Angeles, 32-year-old feminist Simone Hedrick has made the brave decision to finally settle down and […]
TUSCANY — Pinocchio, despite his lifelong wish to become a real boy, has announced he rescinds his statement and would like to become a wooden […]
Yesterday, I was walking back to campus after enjoying a delicious $15 salad at Tendergreens when a homeless man looked right into my eyes and […]
LAS VEGAS— After 35 years of an all-blue cast, the Blue Man Group has decided to unveil their first white member, Brian. “I’m excited to […]
WESTWOOD — A high school student touring the UCLA campus looks like they would be a better fit for second-rate UC Berkeley. “Usually when I’m […]
WESTWOOD — UCLA students majoring in the humanities and social sciences have reportedly been enjoying their first week of summer, which as far as they […]
Hi there! It’s me, the one who sits next to you in class! I just wanted to let you know that I did actually hear […]
WESTWOOD — Third-year Calvin Brown was disheartened upon joining his class GroupMe and seeing more than ten messages from his crush Emily Lee. “You really […]
Ring, ring, your mom is calling! Is she just saying hi? Or has something terrible happened to someone that you may or may not remember? […]
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