UCLA Confesses Most Philosophy Professors Have Several Hundred Page Manifesto
WESTWOOD — Amid a push for increased transparency with the student body, UCLA has confessed that almost all of their philosophy professors have several hundred […]
Campus
Rowing Team Wins Diversity Award, As Many As Two Minorities Represented
ORANGE COUNTY, CA — A local rowing club took home the top prize in USRowing’s diversity awards this week in recognition of their melting pot […]
Study Shows Too Much Weed Causes Memory Loss, May Also Cause Memory Loss
WESTWOOD— A new study out of UCLA has shown that consuming too much marijuana causes memory loss, and it may also cause memory loss. Wait, […]
Professor Announces Solitaire Will Be On Midterm
WESTWOOD — English 10B Professor Jane Houston announced Tuesday that in order to accurately reflect what students have been doing in lecture, solitaire will be […]
Students, Viruses Enjoy Return to Campus
WESTWOOD — The UCLA community, and the UCLA virus community lying dormant in students’ bloodstreams, began its return to campus this week with excitement. “It […]
Westwood Celebrates Lunar New Year by Adding 24th New Boba Shop
WESTWOOD — As a celebration of the Lunar New Year, the Westwood Neighborhood Council has approved the addition of a 24th new boba shop in […]
UCLA Students Excited To Return In-Person But Also Not
WESTWOOD — UCLA students expressed collective excitement this week about the return to in-person instruction, but also not. “Yeah, I’m stoked to go back,” said […]
Gene Block Sees Shadow, 6 More Weeks Of Online School
WESTWOOD— Yesterday morning, UCLA Chancellor Gene Block emerged out of his burrow and saw his own shadow, thus dooming UCLA students to six more weeks […]
Frats Boycott COVID “Rapid” Tests, Claim 15 Minutes Is A Substantial Amount Of Time To Last
WESTWOOD— The John Wooden Center’s recent facilitation of rapid COVID-19 tests was met with heavy resistance this week, as several local fraternities protested the implication […]
Student Becomes Disability Rights Advocate After His Midterms Shift To In-Person
WESTWOOD — A tireless new advocate for disability rights has emerged at UCLA in the form of fourth-year Jordan Jortson, who recently found out his […]