Top Five Books That Could’ve Been An Email
To Whom It May Concern, In today’s world, clear and concise communication is more important than ever. Electronic messaging has revolutionized almost every aspect of […]
Life
Person Who Woke Up For 8 AM Lived Ten Lifetimes By Time You Woke Up
SAMSARA – Local history major and winner of the self-given “bravest and most grizzled person of all time” award Jenette Broxton is reported to have […]
Student Who Took Baton To Skull Not Really Feeling Up For Musicology Midterm
WESTWOOD — After last week’s tumultuous events, fourth-year communications major Jim Boon just cannot seem to rally for his midterm on The Beatles. “I can’t […]
UCLA Dining To Reduce Meal Swipe Value From $9 To One Spoonful Of Gruel
Ackerman Student Union – UCLA Housing announced recently that the meal swipe value will be reduced from nine dollars to one spoonful of cold, chunky […]
Throwing Up In Class And Four Other Trends That Have Majorly Fallen Off
Reminiscing on trends that used to be all the rage but haven’t gotten a lot of attention lately? The Westwood Enabler has you covered. These […]
UCLA Introduces 0P Plan Where You Watch Your Friends Eat
WESTWOOD — UCLA Housing has decided to launch a brand new meal plan for students living on campus, where purchasers can swipe into dining halls […]
Freshman Faux Pas? The First Guy You Ate With At De Neve Is A Sex Offender
WESTWOOD — As the 2023-24 school year approaches its end, freshman students are coming forward to share their horror stories about dining hall encounters with […]
Second-Year Still Recovering From Epic Hometown Spring Break
WESTWOOD — Second-year Creative Writing major Sue Perr-Wilde is still in recovery from her epic spring break adventure where she re-explored her hometown grocery stores, […]
Meant To Be: The Cruel And Beautiful Strings Of Fate Have Caused Our Paths To Cross On This Four-Way Crosswalk
Hello again, stranger. It’s funny, isn’t it? How life works. Despite meeting mere moments ago, our bodies are now locked in an ancient ritual, performing […]