
Opinion: I Listened To The Daily Once, And Now I Am Omniscient
Greetings, lesser one. It is I, your neighbor in POLSCI 30, here to inform you of my recent endeavors in the political sphere. Last night, […]
Greetings, lesser one. It is I, your neighbor in POLSCI 30, here to inform you of my recent endeavors in the political sphere. Last night, […]
WESTWOOD — After years of appearing only vaguely wild and jungle-like, the UCLA Samueli School of Engineering will finally be building a Rainforest Cafe in […]
We’ve all sat through the same boring eighth grade science class where they teach you about “erosion.” They say water flowed through some rocks and […]
LOS ANGELES ZOO— In an attempt to reduce the human (and animal) impact on the climate and focus on sustainable energy, scientists at the Los […]
LOUISVILLE, K.Y.— Retired jockey and racehorse enthusiast Hannah Ryder has recently developed a horsey addiction to ketamine. “It started as a bonding activity with my […]
WESTWOOD— Students were shocked this morning when student athlete Will B. Quick achieved the speed of Mach 5 scootering down Bruinwalk. “All I saw was […]
WESTWOOD — UCLA’s College of Letters and Sciences announced a new Rizzonomics major for the 2023–2024 academic year this week, which has the campus community […]
YOUR CROTCH — Despite eight previous hours of blessed discharge-free existence while you were wearing that ratty pair of granny panties you’ve had since high […]
WESTWOOD — You’ve been complaining for two months now about the rain we’ve gotten this winter. You’re telling everyone that you’re sick and tired of […]
WESTWOOD — UCLA is known for its beautiful architecture and iconic buildings. Even with a melancholy Mathematic Sciences Building, UCLA can keep its top spot […]
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