CAPS Refocuses Outreach Efforts To Girls Who Cut Their Own Bangs
WESTWOOD — An official statement issued Friday by UCLA’s Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS) announced their decision to channel resources towards girls who cut their […]
Campus
Local Flyerers Not Advertising, Just Hate Trees
WESTWOOD — A new student organization, the Bruin Dendrophobic Social Movement (BDSM), began flyering daily last Wednesday on Bruin Walk to promote their bold new […]
Huge Football Player Somehow Makes Kids’ Razor Scooter Work
CERRITOS, CA — Physicists have taken to the Razor Scooter headquarters in Cerritos, California earlier this week in an attempt to study the engineering genius […]
Young Research Library Introduces Sensory Deprivation Tanks
WESTWOOD — In preparation for finals week, the Charles E. Young Research Library’s collaboration pods have been replaced with sensory deprivation tanks full of salt […]
Feminist Hero Comments “OMG!!!” On Female Acquaintance’s Instagram Photo
LOS ANGELES — In the name of advancing women’s equality, feminist hero Serena Colli commented “OMG!!!” on a female acquaintance’s photo. “I don’t even know […]
Australian Fire Update
In lieu of impending ecological collapse, UCLA continues to closely monitor the New South Wales Bushfires in accordance with the Australian government. There are currently […]
UCLA Changes Zero Waste Initiative To Zero Waste Receptacles Initiative
WESTWOOD — After realizing that their Zero Waste Initiative was not going to be accomplished by 2020, UCLA Sustainability has revised their goal into the […]
Student Munches Lunch at Bunche
WESTWOOD — Imprudent third year theater student Daniel Dent munches crunchy lunch inside of Bunche. “I know it’s ambitious, and a bit suspicious, but my […]
Only Man In Gender Studies Class Raises Hand
WESTWOOD — In last Tuesday’s Introduction to Gender Studies discussion, Brock Price, a 6-foot tall football player, frat brother, and the only man in the […]
Local Man Not Nazi, Just Thinks Swastikas Look Cool
LOS ANGELES — In an unsolicited interview Friday evening, local WASP Luke Campbell adamantly refused any allegiance to the Third Reich, despite a prominent swastika […]