Bird Tipping Not the Same, Say Students Of Rural Background

Graphic by Isaiah Little

WESTWOOD — Early Friday morning, students hailing from rural hometowns saw an opportunity to engage in a favorite childhood pastime after drunkenly stumbling past herds of Bird scooters. “Tippin’ shit, it’s usually super fun,” said Jedediah Lee Jackson, a self-described student of “God’s Country” in the College of Arts and Architecture. “Them scooters fall over like stacks o’ hay — they didn’t put up nearly s’much fight as a good ol’ cow! Why, what kinda birds are they anyhow?” At press time, Jedediah and his cohort continue to disappointedly roam the streets of Westwood, looking for objects or animals that command the respect necessary to be tipped.

About Jack Grossman 4 Articles
Jack Grossman is from Oklahoma.