Report: Dianne Feinstein Bullied By Senator As Child

WASHINGTON Following a viral video last week that showed her bullying young children, a report has surfaced that Senator Dianne Feinstein (D – CA) was herself bullied by a senator during her own childhood.

“Oftentimes, traumatic childhood experiences can influence an elected official’s behavior later in life, and this is especially true for senatorial bullying,” said Dr. Elizabeth Negan, a professor of psychology at Georgetown University and the country’s foremost expert on congressional harassment.

“If Senator Feinstein experienced bullying and political humiliation at the hands of a U.S. senator as a child, it’s no wonder that she repeats this behavior as a fully grown senator.”

The report itself was recounted firsthand by Feinstein’s third grade teacher, Ms. Judith Greenbaum. “Oh yes, poor Dianne was a favorite target of federal lawmakers,” said the 115-year-old retired schoolteacher between spoonfuls of tapioca pudding.

“Senator Hiram Johnson was the worst of them. Between congressional recesses, old HJ would drive his congressional detail over to our school just in time to steal Dianne’s lunch money and pull her pigtails. She’d try to stand up for herself by suggesting he change his isolationist policies in light of the clear threat posed by the Axis powers, but he’d just berate her and condescendingly rant about how much of a failure the League of Nations was and how no Republican senator would vote for a declaration of war. It’s just shameful.”

Ms. Greenbaum started to criticize Johnson’s aides for being bystanders but she promptly died in the middle of her sentence.

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