WESTWOOD – In accordance with newly-ordained construction regulations, UCLA administration announced plans to add an additional three new construction sites to campus this week, slated to begin June of 2016 and never go away. “The benefits of having a large concentration of construction sites in an educational environment are apparent,” said Urban Design expert Katherine White, citing statistics from the National Bureau of Cacophony. “According to our research, students find the constant sound of jackhammers going off at random hours of the night soothing. Beyond this, the challenge of finding new ways to get to class has been shown to be intellectually stimulating for students.” White notes that the new policy is but one peg in a larger-scale plan that would eventually see the entirety of campus being put under construction by 2022.
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