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Campus

UCLA Hill Top Shop Announces It Will No Longer Sell AR-15s

March 10, 2018 Jack Lyons 0

Ambitious Political Science Major Adds Minor In Global Studies

March 10, 2018 Jack Lyons 0

WESTWOOD — Seeking to broaden his horizons and diversify his course curriculum, first-year political science major Adam Harper announced in an impassioned Facebook post this […]

Slow-Moving Spider Can No Longer Be Ignored

February 27, 2018 Ivan Chavez 0

LOS ANGELES — Area woman Susan Williams realized that she could no longer ignore the slow-moving arachnid on her bedroom wall on Tuesday afternoon. “Usually, […]

Bruin Republicans Book Logan Paul

February 12, 2018 Jack Lyons 0

WESTWOOD — Bruin Republicans at UCLA announced today that they have partnered with conservative student group Turning Point USA to host disgraced YouTube personality Logan […]

Report: Professor Takes Plagiarism Very Seriously

February 11, 2018 Jack Lyons 0

WESTWOOD — Sources from within Dr. Peter Roebling’s course on political polarization report that the tenured professor took a bold stance on academic integrity in […]

CAPS Going to Need You to Postpone Mental Breakdown Until Two Months from Now

February 11, 2018 Erica Griggs 0

WESTWOOD — UCLA’s Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS) announced in an official press release that it is going to need all students to postpone their […]

Minotaur Found Deep Within Recesses Of MathSci-Boelter

February 11, 2018 Ross Rosenthal 0

MOUNT WESTWOOD — Alas, my friends, that day the quest was dark, For on such a mission I embark, I had seen Scylla and Charybdis, […]

Report: You Probably Won’t Finish That Paper Early

February 11, 2018 Hannah Page 0

WESTWOOD — After much deliberation, sources close to you recently reported that, no, you probably won’t finish that paper early. “I know you’re going away […]

Man Six Beers In Just Taking The Edge Off

February 11, 2018 Kushal Chatterjee 0

WESTWOOD — Area man Joseph Park has consumed six beers in an attempt to take the edge off after a long day. “Yeah, like, I […]

Freshman Relieved She Done With Hardest Quarter

February 8, 2018 Saniya Anand 0

WESTWOOD — Sources report that first-year pre-anthropology major Amelia Collins is relieved she is done with her hardest quarter of her college career. “Everyone told me […]

Posts pagination

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  • Math Professor Doesn’t Know That Half Of Ten Weeks Is Five Weeks

    WESTWOOD — This week, local math professor Dr. Ivil has come under fire after scheduling a midterm for Week 4, a week that is definitively […]

  • Stolen Goods Stolen From Place With Exclusively Stolen Goods

    PARIS — Parisian police officers were stunned to discover this weekend that priceless jewels were stolen from the Louvre, a place that exclusively houses priceless […]

  • BPlate Announces Collab With McDonald’s To Ensure Froyo Machine Breaks More Often

    WESTWOOD – In a surprise new development, BPlate has announced a partnership with the fast food chain McDonald’s to ensure that the froyo machine remains […]

  • Government Shutdown Finally Hits Canvas

    WESTWOOD — Students everywhere awoke this morning to the modern equivalent of snow outside their windows: Canvas has been shut down due to bipartisan gridlock. […]

  • Opinion: If You A Stressed Baddie Who Procrastinated Before Canvas Went Down, This One’s For You

Featured Authors

mm
Georgia McNeill
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Sam Rusk
  • Top 5 UCLA Study Spots If You Don’t Need Outlets, Wifi, Tables or Chairs
  • Ashe Center To Offer Gender Affirming Computer Science Degrees
  • Local Centaur Divided Hot Dog Style

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