How To Get That 4.0 This Quarter!

By , in First Pass Lists on .
UCLA, home of Olympic atheletes, Nobel laureates, and you.

Disappointed with yourself and trying to turn things around? Look no further, we have everything you need to get that 4.0!

#1 – Cheat.

#2 – Don’t have sex with your professor! Have sex with your TA.

#3 – It doesn’t matter because your Uber rating is 4.5.

#4 – They always say they’re going to report you to the Dean of Students for plagiarism, but do they really mean it?

#5 – Quit unproductive habits like sleep and maintaining bodily hygiene.

#6 – Transfer to usc lol fuck $C haha go bruins

#7 – Wear glasses to look smarter.

#8 – Be more intelligent.

#9 – Radically undermine the system of grade point averages by overthrowing the bourgeoisie.

#10 – Drop out and get homeschooled by Lavar Ball.

#11 – You have to really want it.

#12 – Be an athlete and get free tutoring and hoverboards lol remember that?

#13 – Apparently if your roommate dies you automatically get straight As…

#15 – Just realize it’s not gonna happen.

#16 – Switch your major to poly sci.