Frustrated Driver In Parking Lot Wishes He Was Handicapped

By , in Campus News News in Briefs on .
The coveted handicap parking spot.

WESTWOOD—Local driver Mike Thompson found himself wishing he was handicapped when he couldn’t find a space in the Saxon suites parking lot yesterday. “There’s just so many blue spaces sitting there, and I have to wait until some able-bodied person pulls out of a space,” he fumed, threatening to seriously injure a family loading their Camry as he drove past them. “Why couldn’t I just have some muscular dystrophy or even arthritis?” he said aloud, “or even some leprosy, yeah leprosy.” Thompson now plans to drive recklessly down De Neve Drive to crash his car and hopefully break his spine.