Goth Club To Host Gothic Holi
WESTWOOD—After reportedly “feeling left out” during the festivities that took place at the Sunset Rec center this past weekend, members of UCLA’s goth club have […]
WESTWOOD—After reportedly “feeling left out” during the festivities that took place at the Sunset Rec center this past weekend, members of UCLA’s goth club have […]
SONORAN DESERT—Arizona Highway Patrol were awestruck this morning when they discovered the disintegrated remains of an Eastern desert coyote spread for nearly sixty feet and […]
WESTWOOD, CA – The Undergraduate Population Control Board (UPCB) enacted a strict one-child policy Saturday in an attempt to quell the burgeoning overpopulation issue plaguing […]
WESTWOOD – In a press conference today, The Westwood Enabler announced that Satan has acquired the student-run paper. The paper, looking for funds, held an […]
WESTWOOD—Third year biology major Margaret Small confirmed that she is totally happy, in fact “practically leaping out of her seat” at the prospect of having […]
WESTWOOD—After being alerted to an alarming spell of hate speech taking place outside of Kerckhoff hall today, Our Lord God, Divine Creator of the Universe […]
INTERNETS—The humor sector was gravely dismayed after an established satirical humorous comedy newspaper released to its trusting, naive readers a story which failed to be […]
BRENTWOOD—In a shocking turn of events, student Dominic Downer discovered that his parents really had been paying his friends to attend his birthday parties for […]
SEATTLE, WA – While attending a school field trip to the Seattle Public Library Wednesday, Haggerty Elementary 3rd grader Kevin Abernathy was astounded to discover […]
WESTWOOD—In a statement released by the Office of Admissions, UCLA has announced today that it will, for the first time in the school’s nearly century-long […]
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