UCLA To Open Rendez Midwest Offering Daily Casserole Specials
MIDWESTWOOD — UCLA Dining has unveiled plans to expand its Rendezvous West & East dining halls with an extension focused on a different regional cuisine: […]
Campus
UCLA Football Salvages Season With Win Over Brentwood Elementary Pee-Wee Football Team
ROSE BOWL — UCLA Football ended its season on a positive note following their late fourth-quarter comeback against the Brentwood Elementary Pee-Wee Football Team. “What […]
Academic Weapon Commits To Pacifism
WESTWOOD – In a press release sent out at 2 a.m. today, second-year neuroscience major Pri Medd announced she would officially be laying down her […]
Ackerman Union’s Cheddar News Goes Bankrupt, Now Mozzarella Media
WESTWOOD — Cheddar News, the news channel displayed on Ackerman Union’s TVs, declared their bankruptcy today with plans to become Mozzarella Media. “Although it is […]
BPlate Unveils New “Eldritch Concoction” Dish
BPLATE CATACOMBS — UCLA Dining unveiled its latest culinary offering, the Eldritch Concoction, Sunday evening in an underground ceremony featuring fanatical chants, quinoa, and ritual […]
Rivalry Game Held at Actual Coliseum, Features Deadly Gladiatorial Combat
ROME — Football fans were shocked on Saturday when this year’s “Battle for LA” did not take place in the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum, but […]
Surprise! Student Without Any Dreams Or Passion Goes Into Consulting
WESTWOOD — In a decision that has sent shockwaves across the nation, a student devoid of any personality or soul has decided to pursue consulting. […]
Record Label Signs Hedrick Hall Shower Singer
LA LA LAND — After a scramble for one of the most sought-after, up-and-coming artists, We The Best Music Group has secured a lucrative deal […]
“I Love Camping!” This Student Has Been In A Freebies Line Since Yesterday
WESTWOOD — Fourth-year Psychology major and camping enthusiast Abby Nguyen was spotted today on her latest excursion: a freebies line in Bruin Plaza. “Waiting in […]
White Girl Loves De Neve’s Luxury Multi-Cultural Dining
First-year World Arts and Culture major Meg Ann Smith was overjoyed with the wide variety of sophisticated cuisine as well as the tasteful lighting and […]