White Girl Loves De Neve’s Luxury Multi-Cultural Dining

First-year World Arts and Culture major Meg Ann Smith was overjoyed with the wide variety of sophisticated cuisine as well as the tasteful lighting and indie-pop music choices when she first entered De Neve during Week 0. “The chef cooks the waffles right in front of you, that’s gourmet! At home we just pull frozen ones out of the Eggos box and pop them in the microwave,” Smith explained while licking her fingers after eating sushi from The Drey with her hands. “These little guys are great!” she added. “What are they?”

Our culturally educated reporter identified the item as a California Roll before allowing Smith to continue raving about De Neve’s dinner options. “Last night I saw they were offering chicken, but when I took the plate it was this big rectangular thing surrounded by this clumpy looking spicy soup. It was amazing!”

Smith assured our reporter that she was not that naive about the world’s cuisines: “I knew that not all chicken was dinosaur-shaped nuggets but I didn’t think I’d see one until I studied abroad in Barthaylona,” Smith said, stopping to ask our reporter if she said it right. At press time, Smith was acting casual while discreetly watching what toppings her roommate put on the mysterious meal she had just been handed at Feast.