The Westwood Enabler
  • Home
  • News
    • Campus
    • National
    • International
  • Opinion
  • A&E
  • Sports
  • Graphics
    • News In Pictures
    • Infographics
  • Life
  • About
    • Staff
    • Join
    • Contact

covid-19

Report: Judge Who Struck Down Mask Mandate Has A Great Smile

April 26, 2022 Jade Lacy 0

TAMPA — Reporters on the scene at Florida’s Middle District Federal court, where Judge Kathryn Kimball Mizelle recently struck down the mask mandate for public […]

Christopher Nolan Nukes UCLA For 5-Second “Oppenheimer” Shot

March 8, 2022 Milo Ellison 0

WESTWOOD — In what has now become a mass-casualty event, Christopher Nolan has nuked the UCLA campus for a 5-second B-reel scene in his new […]

Doctors Hate Her! Local Woman Says “AWOOGA” Instead Of “Ahhh” At Every Checkup

February 22, 2022 Hanna Barlow 0

LOS ANGELES — Just this week, several Los Angeles doctors came forward to detail their uncomfortable experiences with local woman Riley Coyote, who says “AWOOGA” […]

5 Organs To Steal From Your Significant Other Other Than Their Heart

February 15, 2022 Ammi Lane-Volz 0

Strapped for cash for the best Valentine’s Day gift? Already donated all the blood you can to the blood and platelet center? Not to fret– […]

Students, Viruses Enjoy Return to Campus

February 10, 2022 Jade Lacy 0

WESTWOOD — The UCLA community, and the UCLA virus community lying dormant in students’ bloodstreams, began its return to campus this week with excitement. “It […]

Facebook Rant Strikes Perfect Balance Between “1984” References And Holocaust Comparisons

February 8, 2022 Gabby Bromberg 0

HUNTINGTON BEACH, CA — Herb Matthew reached the pinnacle of his Facebook career Tuesday, after his latest rant struck the perfect balance between references to […]

Gene Block Sees Shadow, 6 More Weeks Of Online School

February 3, 2022 Hanna Barlow 0

WESTWOOD— Yesterday morning, UCLA Chancellor Gene Block emerged out of his burrow and saw his own shadow, thus dooming UCLA students to six more weeks […]

Safety Legends! This Restaurant Switched Their Food To QR Codes

January 13, 2022 Brandon Wang 0

LOS ANGELES — Public health officials clapped when local restaurant Joe’s Burgers, already having replaced its paper menus with QR codes, doubled down on safety […]

Woke man in bed

Woke Guy Prefaces Oral Sex With Acknowledgement We Are On Indigenous Land

December 30, 2021 Tatiana Davidson 0

WESTWOOD — On Friday evening, local ‘woke’ man and third-year global studies major Jack Stoop prefaced oral sex with an acknowledgement that we are on […]

Heartwarming! This Man Wakes Up Every Morning And Finds Out He’s President

December 23, 2021 Brandon Wang 0

WASHINGTON, DC — In what can only be described as a heartwarming break from the nation’s political drama, sources confirmed Monday that every morning Joe […]

Posts navigation

1 2 3 »

Search

Featured Authors

mm
Gillian Smith
  • Weird! Student Goes To Law School Without Exhausting Other Options First
  • Unemployable Student Goes To Grad School
  • Republicans Propose “No Child Left Unshot” Plan

RECOMMENDED

  • Trend Watch! Places In Los Angeles Everyone Should Projectile Vomit At Least Once

    May 3, 2023 0
  • Guy Holding Gene Block’s Voodoo Doll Ups Athletics Budget Again

    May 2, 2023 0
  • Opinion: I’m 🅿️aying 5 GRANDS to the first 7 ppl to Mesage me right now “moneY” 📈💸💪💯❤️

    May 1, 2023 0
  • White House Establishes Federal Holiday Honoring The Girls Trip Making It Out Of The Group Chat

    April 28, 2023 0
  • Fox News Countersues Dominion For Being Big, Fat Meanies

    April 27, 2023 0
FOLLOW US
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram
  • LinkedIn
ARCHIVES

Copyright © 2023 | WordPress Theme by MH Themes