Report: You On Fastest Route Possible

No matter how bad traffic may be, Google Maps will always be there to reassure you about the efficiency of your route.

SAN FERNANDO VALLEY–According to Google Maps, you are on the fastest route possible despite usual traffic. “We were driving from Westwood to Burbank, and naturally, being in Los Angeles, I worried that there may be a faster route that Google Maps had neglected to tell us about,” said your passenger Shianne Dowling. “But once the soft, gentle voice behind Google Maps reassured us that we were on the fastest route possible, there was not a single doubt in my mind that the app had our best interest in mind and that there was no better route we could have possibly taken.” At press time, you were no longer on the fastest route possible as you had switched to Apple Maps.

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About Jack Lyons 68 Articles
Area Man. Freelance fraternity president. Aspiring father of two. Probable future Nobel laureate. Occasionally collude with Russia.