ALBUQUERQUE—Students at a local high school burst into song as a form of protest Tuesday when it was revealed that the school’s basketball captain sang karaoke over his winter break. According to reports, in addition to the karaoke offense, the student auditioned for the school’s spring musical production, Twinkle Towne, and may have feelings for a new student on the academic decathlon team, dubbed “Freaky Genius Girl” by her peers.
The new “freaky genius” student appears to be unaware of social norms at the high school, interacting awkwardly with many of her peers. Rumors indicate that she too auditioned for the school’s spring musical, thus threatening the social status of other students in the drama club. These events later climaxed with a disdainful, vocal protest in the student cafeteria during the lunch period.
“It is better, by far, to keep things as they are,” an anonymous student was overheard singing.
Once loved by all, the captain has quickly become a common enemy of the student body. Remarkably however, the basketball star has not been called gay by any of his peers.
Tensions are expected to culminate this Friday, which is the day of the basketball semifinals, the academic decathlon, and the drama club final callbacks.