HOLLYWOOD — Today, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences made a well-received announcement that the 95th Oscars would be a national convention of people named Oscar. “We have heard your feedback, and we are thrilled to announce that this year’s ceremony will be the best and most inclusive yet,” said host Jimmy “Oscar” Kimmel while scribbling on his name tag. “But we haven’t forgotten about the stars yet! There will also be plenty of famous Oscars that will take the stage tonight! Oscar Isaac, Oscar de la Renta, Oscar the Grouch. You name him, we have him!” At press time, Will Smith was preparing to sneak in the venue by donning his Oscar costume from Shark Tale.