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Dentistry

Pinocchio Discovers Real World, No Longer Wants To Be Real Boy

June 18, 2022 Bella Dunham 0

TUSCANY — Pinocchio, despite his lifelong wish to become a real boy, has announced he rescinds his statement and would like to become a wooden […]

“He Doesn’t Bite,” Says Man About Dog Who Stabs People

May 20, 2022 Amariyah Lane-Volz 0

CORNER BY CHICK-FIL-A — Area man Brad Perez confirmed this week that while his dog Brutus does not bite people, he does stab them. “Of […]

2,022 Things To Look Forward To In 2022

January 7, 2022 Robi Chatterjee 0

2021 has wrapped up and we are now in a new year. Change can be scary, so here is a list of 2,022 things that […]

COVID Test Vending Machine Just Wants To Be Spit On

November 5, 2021 Arman 0

WESTWOOD — The COVID test vending machine located behind Haines Hall recently spoke out about its need to be spit on. “Many have tried to […]

MIT Researchers Develop Method For Teeth To Get Sunburnt

February 20, 2020 Dylan Wood 0

CAMBRIDGE, MA — In a scientific breakthrough, researchers at MIT have developed a mixture which, upon consumption, allows teeth to develop severe sunburns. “Why? Because […]

1/5 Dentists Agree Flossing For Little Bitch Boys

October 31, 2019 Kylie Kinne 0

NEW YORK — The American Dental Association released a groundbreaking study this weekend which showed that while four out of five dentists agree that daily […]

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