CAPS Going to Need You to Postpone Mental Breakdown Until Two Months from Now

By , in Campus News Uncategorized on .
CAPS is on call 24 hours a day for students in crisis, conditional on a two-month advanced booking.

WESTWOOD—UCLA’s Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS) announced in an official press release that it is going to need all students to postpone their mental breakdowns until their appointments, which must be scheduled two months in advance. “Unfortunately, we’re all booked up for the next two months, so, try to hold it together I guess,” the CAPS executive director, Nicole Green, said in response to students’ desperate pleas for immediate psychological treatment. “We’re just trying to catch up with students who came in week 1 last quarter mentally deteriorated by academic and emotional stress.” However, Green reassured students that “in the meantime, 911 will always be there if your mental illness drives you to the brink of suicide.”