LOS ANGELES— Brendon Urie, lead singer and only remaining member of the former pop-rock band Panic! At The Disco, has announced that he will be filing for divorce from himself. “Brendon and I are no longer together,” stated Urie, whose relationship with Urie began in 1987, when they shared a hospital room. “After 35 years, being with each other just felt like a fever you can’t sweat out. I had high hopes for our relationship, but it looks like he was just another casual affair.” At press time, Urie and Urie were locked in a drawn-out court battle over who would get custody of the good albums.
