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Sleep

Roommates Nationwide Participate in “Never Leave Your Fucking Bed” Challenge

April 14, 2025 Georgia McNeill 0

WESTWOOD — According to the National Roommate Association, a dangerous new craze is sweeping the nation: the “Never Leave Your Fucking Bed” challenge. “HEYYYYYYY whatsgoinonguysitsyaboy […]

Ben Shapiro Defeats Wokeness At UCLA By Putting Audience To Sleep

October 22, 2024 Shane Cameranesi 0

Student Hits Snooze On All 5 Aspirationally Early Alarms

October 30, 2023 Theo Zhang 0

WESTWOOD — This morning, after sleeping through all five of their alarms, third-year Neuroscience major Terry Sleepyhead finally got up at noon for their aspirational […]

Hedrick Fire Alarm Going Off To This. Sick. Beat.

October 16, 2022 Aidan Brooks 0

WESTWOOD — Residents of Hedrick Hall have been increasingly frustrated with the recent switch from standard fire alarms to ones with a small Taylor Swift trapped […]

  • Joe Bruin Bulks Up, Grows Beard For Pride Month

    WESTWOOD — After undergoing twink death at the age of 99, beloved UCLA mascot Joe Bruin has now transformed into the bear he was meant […]

  • Top 5 UCLA Study Spots If You Don’t Need Outlets, Wifi, Tables or Chairs

    1. Tongva Steps Nothing says “studious” like sitting on a wet, inclined plane surrounded by the sights, sounds, and smells of the vibrant UCLA slackline […]

  • Top Four Ways To Come Out To Your Family So They Can’t Say No

    Coming out to your family can be difficult. From telling your uncle you’re bicurious to letting your little sister know you’re transgender, you never quite […]

  • “How Will This Affect Saffron And Rose?” Asks Guy Trying To Form Opinion On Iran War

    WESTWOOD — After hearing about America’s bombing of Iran, one man still could not pick a side to support until knowing the fate of local […]

  • Scientists Discover Why Old People Smell Like That

    WESTWOOD — A groundbreaking discovery was made at the UCLA Geriatric Research and Medical Association (GRAMA) this Tuesday, after an extensive study that involved locking […]

Featured Authors

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Georgia McNeill
  • Antisemitism Is Over! Trump Administration Cuts Funding From Cancer Research
  • Top Four Ways To Come Out To Your Family So They Can’t Say No
  • Opinion: No, I Will Not Pie You On Bruinwalk, Please Don’t Involve Me In Your Fetishes
Sam Rusk
  • Top 5 UCLA Study Spots If You Don’t Need Outlets, Wifi, Tables or Chairs
  • Ashe Center To Offer Gender Affirming Computer Science Degrees
  • Local Centaur Divided Hot Dog Style

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