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Articles by Shane Cameranesi

Ben Shapiro Defeats Wokeness At UCLA By Putting Audience To Sleep

October 22, 2024 Shane Cameranesi 0

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UC Berkeley Mysteriously Vanishes

BERKELEY — At approximately 4:20 PM, the East Bay was shocked to discover that their beloved campus of UC Berkeley had disappeared. “I’ve never seen […]
5 Tips On How To Have A Jew-“ish” Passover Seder

1. Show up late. “Early” is on time, and “on time” is late? NAH! “On time” is as real as your aunt’s nose, and “late” […]
Opinion: Shut The Fuck Up About Coachella

An open letter to everyone on Instagram who is about to go to Coachella this weekend: SHUT UP!!! SHUT UP!!! I DO NOT CARE!!! I’m […]
UCLA Radio Announces Which Queer-Baiting Bay Area White Girl Has Won The Indie-Off

526 LANDFAIR — After secretly watching countless carabiner-clad brunettes with nose piercings attend their parties at the Compound backlot, the UCLA Radio Events team has […]
“Sensitive Young Man” Walk Interrupted By Campus Tour Guide

WESTWOOD — Last Thursday, one student’s weekly evening “sensitive young man” walk tragically got interrupted by a campus tour guide. “I was pacing around the […]

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Breaking: He Is Fallen
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OPINION: Useless Sproul Laundry Machines Can’t Even Make Me Cum

Douchebag Dogwhistle: Avoid Men Who Use The Phrase “Walkable Cities”
Local White Boy Makes Big Splash In Intramural Dodgeball Scene
Historic UCLA Rugby Hazing Ritual Ruined By Guy Who Just Loves To Drink Piss

Opinion: Shut The Fuck Up About Coachella
Bruin Day Tour Group Throws Peanuts At Students
J.D. Vance Just Happy To Be Included In Group Chat For Once

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