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Articles by Aidan Brooks

If You’re Reading This, You’re Probably Illiterate

April 20, 2023 Aidan Brooks 0

NAHSUD, CK — Aquaked climpower attelling adil. Imstreockt, xillo papapay eraow cellordion fierer skegypteardis ocolog prograker kalistindered cesstial. Ce guinsters xetarious (belleciarcle) feple. Muelhevinet surogou […]

UCLA’s Final Offer: Replace All TAs With This Cute Widdle Guy

December 14, 2022 Aidan Brooks 0

WESTWOOD — In a bold move, UCLA officials have announced plans to fire all teaching assistants and replace them with Mr. Pudding. “We are always […]

An Apple A Day Defends You From Your Doctor

November 4, 2022 Aidan Brooks 0

TRANSYLVANIA — Recent studies have revealed that doctors are repelled by apples—a fact that the doctor hunters of Transylvania have known for years. “Apples have […]

Hedrick Fire Alarm Going Off To This. Sick. Beat.

October 16, 2022 Aidan Brooks 0

WESTWOOD — Residents of Hedrick Hall have been increasingly frustrated with the recent switch from standard fire alarms to ones with a small Taylor Swift trapped […]

Diversity Gone Mad: Blue Man Group Brings On White Guy

June 14, 2022 Aidan Brooks 0

LAS VEGAS— After 35 years of an all-blue cast, the Blue Man Group has decided to unveil their first white member, Brian. “I’m excited to […]

Student Has A Blast At Virtual Study Abroad

May 24, 2022 Aidan Brooks 0

WESTWOOD — Due to the pandemic, second-year linguistics student Dan Gene-Attell willingly paid $20,000 to take online classes from Barcelona, Spain while remaining in his […]

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