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opinion

Opinion: The Roebling Block Party Is Needlessly Destructive. Also, I Wasn’t Invited.

October 6, 2022 The Daily Bruin 0

WESTWOOD — Students set private property ablaze Thursday night at the quarterly Roebling block party, disturbing the peace for Westwood residents trying to get ahead […]

Opinion: How Can I Help The Homeless If They Don’t Have Venmo?

June 16, 2022 Cash Freeman 0

Yesterday, I was walking back to campus after enjoying a delicious $15 salad at Tendergreens when a homeless man looked right into my eyes and […]

Opinion: I Heard Your Stomach Growl In Class, But I’m A Really Nice Person

June 6, 2022 Jenn Tull 0

Hi there! It’s me, the one who sits next to you in class! I just wanted to let you know that I did actually hear […]

Op-Ed: I Think My Girlfriend Is Actually Tupac In Disguise

October 21, 2019 Matthew Sneezelton 0

I consider myself a rational person. I take things as they come, I try not to jump to conclusions, and I definitely don’t believe in […]

Op-Ed: Jimmy Carter Is Dead

August 14, 2019 Darryl Daniels 0

Let me be the first to say it. I’m happy to be the voice for the voiceless. After many hours of contemplation and meditation on […]

Op-Ed: If I Wear Jeans, You Must Call Me Jeans Block

April 2, 2019 Gene D. Block 0

To the Campus Community: On Monday morning, I substituted my normal chancellorial slacks for a pair of comfortable, stylish, denim jeans. Yet for the entire […]

Wario Opens Up About Struggle With Obesity

March 2, 2019 Wario 0

My name is Wario. I have been blessed to be a team member in the Nintendo franchise for 27 years, serving as a foil to […]

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POINT: We Should Colonize Mars / COUNTERPOINT: Post-Colonial Literature Is Terrible

March 6, 2016 Kushal Chatterjee 0

Point We Should Colonize Mars By: Arthur Von Clarksburg Space is the final frontier. Much has been said about our distant horizon, the great manifest […]

Op-Ed: Why Is Everyone So Mean To Me?

February 14, 2016 Hillary Clinton 0

People of America, I have a message for you all. Stop being big fat meanie jerkfaces! It’s not fair! It was my turn to be […]

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Op-Ed: Shouldn’t ALL Fridays Matter?

November 27, 2015 Nathan Guzik 0

This holiday season, we’ve all gathered our families together to reminisce about the year gone by, and wish each other well into the coming year. […]

Posts pagination

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  • Antisemitism Is Over! Trump Administration Cuts Funding From Cancer Research

    WESTWOOD — After the Trump administration justified cutting research funding to UCLA by citing concerns of antisemitism, Jews and Gentiles alike were shocked when the […]

  • Opinion: Suck It, Pre-Meds! Now We’re All Going To Be Unemployed

    It finally happened. Despite being so against equity and inclusion, Trump finally did something to level the playing field between you pre-meds and us humanities, […]

  • Roommate Unable To Clean Dorm Because Floor Is Lava

    WESTWOOOD – In an emergency press conference inside your dorm today, your roommate announced they are unable to clean because the floor is lava. “I […]

  • Woke Mother Performs First Successful “Straight Conversion Therapy”

    WEST HOLLYWOOD — On Tuesday, local woke mother Dorothy McBeal celebrated the results of months of grueling treatment as her first and only child finally […]

  • two skeletons kissing in front of a rainbow pride flag

    Skeletons In Closet Come Out

Featured Authors

mm
Georgia McNeill
  • Antisemitism Is Over! Trump Administration Cuts Funding From Cancer Research
  • Top Four Ways To Come Out To Your Family So They Can’t Say No
  • Opinion: No, I Will Not Pie You On Bruinwalk, Please Don’t Involve Me In Your Fetishes
Sam Rusk
  • Top 5 UCLA Study Spots If You Don’t Need Outlets, Wifi, Tables or Chairs
  • Ashe Center To Offer Gender Affirming Computer Science Degrees
  • Local Centaur Divided Hot Dog Style

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