Things To Be Thankful For This Thanksgiving

By , in First Pass Lists on .
Don’t worry, no one is thankful for the food.

Still not sure what to be thankful for this Thanksgiving? Don’t worry! The good writers of the Westwood Enabler have you covered.

#1 – Our boys in blue

#2 – Our glorious leader President Donald Trump, who valiantly rescued three UCLA basketball players from the Chinese criminal justice system

#3 – When you walk in the shower and there isn’t even a single hair on the ground

#4 – Sitting next to someone in class without pneumonia

#5 – That one class where you’re not expected to talk to anyone because you have no friends in it

#6 – Charles Manson finally resting with the angels

#7 – Your roommate’s boyfriend who lives here now, I guess

#8 – That Yellowstone volcano that will kill us all

#9 – The two hours on Mondays my roommates are gone

#10 – Sticking your hand forearm deep in a turkey’s anus, as is tradition

#11 – Native American immune systems that were susceptible to smallpox which allowed this country to be settled by western Europeans

#12 – A shallow grave in the desert that hasn’t been discovered yet

#13 – Your friendly local satirical publication

#14 – Gene Block