“The Bugs Are Just Eating Me Out Today!” Says Person Who Doesn’t Understand Sex Terms

SALT LAKE CITY — On a nature walk this afternoon, local sex-term-not-understander Virgil Cox stated that the bugs were “just eating [them] out.” “Man, these bugs are really sucking me dry,” said Cox, religion major and BYU class of 2026. “One of my friends just laughed and said ‘that’s what she said,’ and I was like, ‘who is this “she” character?’” At press time, Cox was seen wondering why there was no suit and tie requirement for the local gentlemen’s club.

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About Ammi Lane-Volz 19 Articles
Ammi Lane-Volz has a rock in their shoe. Hey, guys, wait-- guys, stop walking so they can get this rock out of their shoe.