Students Troubled By Lack Of Old White Men To Vote For In USAC Elections

WESTWOOD — A gamut of candidates have thrown their hats in the ring to get on the USAC payroll, yet some students are left wishing for more representative candidates to vote for. “Old white men are the future of this country, and I’m tired of pretending they’re not,” declared Stad S. Kwoh, a third-year biology major and self-professed “old person enjoyer.” “In fact, I’ve never seen our national government run without them! On an unrelated note, I am deeply uncomfortable with losing my position of political power, and also, women scare me.” At press time, Kwoh was rewatching the Trump/Biden debates with a gleeful smile and a noticeable half-chub.