Plane Crashes After Man Forgets To Enable Airplane Mode

By , in News News in Briefs on .

NEW YORK — The Federal Aviation Administration released a press statement this morning, divulging that the Boeing 747 that crashed shortly after departing JFK International Airport was the result of a man forgetting to enable airplane mode. “Initially, we thought the crash was due to the several pigeons we found in the jet engine, but after analyzing the black box we discovered radio waves from ‘Mark’s iPhone’ that interfered with the cockpit instrumentation and caused the crash,” said the FAA spokesman, indicating that generally the 30 second pre-take off routine by the flight attendants was enough to get everyone to turn their electronic devices off. “I hope everyone takes our warnings more seriously. When the oxygen mask falls from the cabin, secure yours prior to assisting others. Please do not inflate the life jacket before exiting the cabin in case of a water landing.” At liftoff, flight attendants were reminding passengers to stow the tray tables and return their seats to the upright position.