CABO SAN LUCAS, MEXICO—In anticipation of rowdy Spring Break crowds, the resort town of Cabo San Lucas has begun to draft and implement a variety of safety precautions for next month’s influx of American college students. “I just hope they leave the gonorrhea at the border this time around,” Cabo said optimistically, sweeping up the pool deck. “Last year, I made bank by collecting all the discarded red solo cups and selling them to the recycling center, but I still never figured out what to do with all those used condoms.” At press time, Cabo wiped the sweat from her brow and started to string up nets for the impending games of Tequila Volleyball.
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Interim Editor-In-Chief, Full Time Smart-Ass