Ally Would Totally Date Girls If Like, Into That

Jillian Smith, a true LGBTQ+ ally!

WESTWOOD — Reports confirm this past Tuesday, Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender (L.G.B.T.) ally Jillian Smith claimed she would totally date girls if she was like, into that. “Women are so strong and beautiful! I would totally date a girl like, if I was into that!” Smith said in response to her friend mentioning the end of Pride Month, but was quick to reclaim her heterosexual identity to dispel any uncertainty. “Of course I am totally straight! I just find guys like Chris Hemsworth or Zac Efron or my TA Dave more attractive, but that doesn’t negate any other individual’s sexuality, that’s just mine. But man, it must be so much easier to date a girl, too bad I can’t because I’m straight!” At press time, Jillian was seen switching her Tinder preferences to both women and men, but just to make friends!

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About Jennifer Harbeck 6 Articles
Jen Harbeck is 100% sure she is actually just a pair of socks. Look at the facts: Her skin is the texture of cotton, she smells vaguely like feet, and she loves the ground. Jen Harbeck = Pair of socks.