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Amazon

HBO Merges With Other Streaming Services To Form MaxCockMount+

April 13, 2023 Rujula Rao 0

BURBANK — Following the rebrand of HBO Max to just “Max,” Warner Bros. announced today that they will also be merging with the Peacock and […]

“Intersectionality,” And Other Buzzwords You Can Use To Justify Buying From Amazon

March 5, 2022 Jade Lacy 0

We all know how it goes. You run out of masks or printer ink or clean underwear, and you need more ASAP. There’s only one […]

Jeff Bezos Pledges Three New TV Ads To Help Struggling Amazon Employees

May 12, 2020 Dylan Wood 0

SEATTLE — Facing criticism from employees regarding poor conditions in his warehouses, Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos is attempting to ease their concerns by pledging three […]

  • Flakers Anonymous Reports Record Low Attendance

  • Consulting Clubs Consulted On What The Fuck They Actually Do

    WESTWOOD — UCLA’s ten thousand consulting clubs recently came under fire when they were consulted on what their clubs really do besides pose for headshots […]

  • Man With Fragile Ego Sits In Waymo Driver’s Seat

    WESTWOOD — While returning home from a failed driver’s license test, aspiring Cybertruck owner Grant T. Otto broke Waymo’s ‘rider rules’ by climbing into the […]

  • Angeleno Prepares For Storm By Already Driving Like Shit

    WESTWOOD — In preparation for this week’s rare October storm, one local resident has decided to take up driving like shit in order to lessen […]

  • Uh Oh! Student’s Twelfth Grandparent Just Died

    WESTWOOD — Last Sunday, second-year Microbiology, Immunology, and Molecular Genetics major Calvin Dozer revealed that his Step-Step-Grandpappy just died, making this the twelfth grandparent dead […]

Featured Authors

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Georgia McNeill
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  • Opinion: No, I Will Not Pie You On Bruinwalk, Please Don’t Involve Me In Your Fetishes
Sam Rusk
  • Top 5 UCLA Study Spots If You Don’t Need Outlets, Wifi, Tables or Chairs
  • Ashe Center To Offer Gender Affirming Computer Science Degrees
  • Local Centaur Divided Hot Dog Style

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