WESTWOOD — Reflecting UCLA’s commitment to recognizing the achievements of its distinguished alumni as well as its desire to offer an education that encompasses a diversity of perspectives, the Time’s Higher Education top-ranked public university began construction on its newest department, the Ben Shapiro School of Owning the Libs. “From starring in hour-long YouTube compilations to selling what I understand are an extremely credible line of brain-pills, Ben Shapiro’s success has been remarkable and represents the height of America’s conservative intellectual tradition,” said incoming Shapiro School Dean Chad Roberts, while showcasing an artist’s rendering of the school’s soon to be unveiled statue depicting Shapiro dabbing in the direction of student protesters, his left and right forearms labeled “logic” and “reason,” respectively. “We are very excited to offer a compelling array of courses for students to take, including Intro to Climate Change Whataboutery and Facts and Feelings: One Doesn’t Care About the Other.” At press time, UCLA experienced an application surge from the crucial demographics of “edgy male 13 year olds” and “people who tweet the word Venezuela in Bernie Sanders’ replies.”
About Max Kohn 1 Article
Max Kohn is an aspiring pedantic leftist academic, only hindered by his absence of wit, lack of a charming Slovenian accent, and inability to understand Hegelian dialectics. Aside from forcing obscure references to narrow audiences, Max is the recipient of three consecutive Very Online™ Awards and works to build solidarity with space comrades, in his spare time.