LIVERPOOL — In stunning never-before-seen footage, the new documentary “The Beatles: Get Back” appears to suggest the existence of a previously unknown fourth member of the legendary British band. “This will surely come as a shock to fans of the Fab Three everywhere,” said radio DJ Meg Griffin, adding that the revelation was “like if they added another hero to the Fantastic 3.” “What even was the guy’s name again? Bingo? Rango? Anyway, at least we now have an answer to the age-old question of what if there was a song about an octopus’ garden.” Attempts by The Enabler to interview this supposed fourth Beatle were unsuccessful, though an unnamed spokesman for Mr. Starr did wish our readers “peace and love.”
