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Articles by Sierra Scott

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About Sierra Scott
Sierra is an accomplished writer who has been with the Westwood Enabler for as long as many can remember. Years? No. Decades? No. The ancient Mesopotamians referred to her as "Shalduth, the Night Bringer" but she usually goes by "Sierra."
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Classmate Somehow Always Surprised When His Turn To Talk In Circle

April 30, 2017 Sierra Scott 0

WESTWOOD—Sources confirm that second-year fine arts student Brett Phillips is somehow always surprised when it’s his turn to participate in class conversations that follow sequential […]

Area Man Worried Waiter Should Have Written Down Order

April 30, 2017 Sierra Scott 0

LOS ANGELES—While dining at a local restaurant with several friends on Monday, area man Greg Johnson became increasingly worried when the waiter did not write […]

TA Just Basking In Students’ Silence

March 5, 2017 Sierra Scott 0

WESTWOOD—Teaching Assistant Victoria Ivanov was reportedly just basking in students’ dumbfounded silence following a “vague question” in this week’s discussion for an upper-division political science […]

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Report: Headphone Volume No Match For Crunchy Chip

March 5, 2017 Sierra Scott 0

WESTWOOD—Area man Louis Miller reported on Monday that no matter how high he turned the volume of his earbuds, he could not overpower the sound […]

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White Celebrity In $100,000 Dress Wins Gold Statue For Being The Best, Denounces Trump

February 27, 2017 Sierra Scott 0

LOS ANGELES—A white celebrity wearing a $100,000 dress got onstage at The Academy Awards where she accepted a golden statue for being the best and […]

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Area Man Loved That Cinematography

February 12, 2017 Sierra Scott 0

WESTWOOD—Citing the director’s artistic use of various camera techniques in a new movie he saw on Tuesday, area man Noah Pitzer loved that cinematography. “The […]

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Report: Student Had Busy Day, But Friend’s Was Even Busier

February 12, 2017 Sierra Scott 0

WESTWOOD—Student Alfie Hochman reported last Friday that he had a busy day, but his friend’s was even busier. “I had a class from 9-10 a.m., […]

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Report: My Break Was Good, How Was Yours?

January 18, 2017 Sierra Scott 0

WESTWOOD—Scientists recently concluded a comprehensive study following UCLA’s winter recess that indicates that my break was good, how was yours? Mine was pretty relaxing; I […]

UCLA To Students: If You Donate One Kidney, Donors Will Back 250,000 More

November 16, 2016 Sierra Scott 0

WESTWOOD—Chancellor Gene D. Block announced in a university press release today that if enough students donate one kidney to UCLA for the True Bruin Challenge, […]

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Area Mom Uses Term “Hook Up” Incorrectly Again

November 13, 2016 Sierra Scott 0

LOS ANGELES—Area mom Lois Stevens reportedly used the term “hook up” incorrectly again yesterday when encouraging her daughter to attend her professor’s office hours. “Surely […]

Posts pagination

1 2 3 »
  • Trump Gives 15-Year-Old Girl Apology Smooch

    WASHINGTON, D.C. — Following new revelations about his relationship with Jeffrey Epstein, who he calls “the greatest pedophile of all time,” President Donald J. Trump […]

  • Democrats Advance Key Policy Goal of Strengthening Republican Party

    WASHINGTON, D.C. — Weeks of less-than-firm resolve paid off Wednesday as Democrats forged a shutdown-ending compromise that accomplishes one of the party’s longstanding goals: strengthening […]

  • Opinion: I Will Not Apologize For My Phony Indie Stache

    dear loyal followers, i address you today not by way of reselling my shart-stained 70s denim for $650 on grailed, or the carousel post of […]

  • Opinion: Rejecting Donald Trump From Art School Was A Bad Idea

    Rejecting Donald Trump from art school wasn’t the best idea. Listen, I know that Donald Trump’s art is absolute dogshit. Watching Donald Trump try to […]

  • Opinion: Halloweekend Was For Hot Girls But Veteransdaynight Is For Us Mediocre Bitches

    UCLA is full of beautiful, talented, funny, smart, and well-rounded women. I am not one of them. And that’s okay! I can clean the hell […]

Featured Authors

Grace McIntyre
  • UCLA Opens “B-ruining Lives” Resource Center For Student Anti-Wellbeing
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  • A Letter To Prospective Student Tour Groups: I’m Better Than You
Zach Fischer
  • Backpacking Club Announces Trip To Public Affairs Building
  • UCLA Administration Goes On Strike to Protest AFSCME
  • Economists Worried As Daylight Savings Runs Out

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