1. What did The Saurus say to the Triceratops? Hi, hello, greetings, hey, howdy, and finally, hiya!
Just a well-written joke all around! The multiple synonyms at the end really make that punchline hit hard, and your father will definitely see that you have a knack for vocabulary.
2. What do you call a velociraptor who has read a thesaurus? A speediraptor!
Keep showing off those vocab skills! You didn’t win that second-grade spelling bee for nothing—and your dad doesn’t even acknowledge your talent!
3. What is a dinosaur’s favorite baked good? Synonym rolls!
Nothing screams “attention” more than driving his favorite 2003 Ford Expedition into a stop sign, but you still go ahead and do it anyway. He doesn’t even so much as bat an eye toward you. All you want is to be yelled at. Looked at. Not to feel invisible like you have for your entire life. Maybe this stupid joke will finally make him look at you again.
4. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus!
Punny AND topical! If your dad can’t appreciate this one, then you are worthless.
Remember when you got into UCLA? And how when you told him, he just nodded at you? And remember how complete that one nod made you feel? That was all it took to instantly wash away 19 years of pain. 19 years of not feeling like you’re enough. 19 years of not being allowed in the passenger seat of that 2003 Ford Expedition. All it took was one look in your direction.
I owe you nothing. I didn’t choose to be born. But you chose to have a child. You owe me everything.