WESTWOOD — This Monday evening, UCLA Administration once again reinforced their commitment to protecting Jewish community on campus by tearing down the sukkah that was fostering Jewish community on campus. “We care very deeply about our Zioni— I mean… um, Jewish students on campus and respect however they choose to identify regardless of their political beliefs,” said interim chancellor Darnell Hunt, who was seen Googling ‘is sukkot even a real holiday?’ while watching the Ben Shapiro talk. “To promote safety, we had some riot cops try to escort these students to the safest environment we can provide, Van Nuys jail. Unfortunately, these students refused to enter into a Dialogue across Difference with our police and their batons, so we had to respectfully destroy the sukkah.” At press time, UCLA was giving counterprotestors free checkups to ensure they didn’t hurt their vocal cords yelling slurs.