WESTWOOD — In anticipation of even less housing space and even more budget cuts, UCLA Housing has attempted to cut costs by signing a dorm furnishing contract with Chinese online shopping company Temu. “They said we could get a $200 reward if we spent $10 on an 8-pack of the most uncomfortable underwear in history. All we had to do was send out an invitation link to the entire student body. I’d say that’s well worth it,” said Trip L. Tenenroom, Vice Assistant Secretary Vice Chancellor of Housing & Hospitality Services at UCLA. “Then it turned out the $200 was actually a credit worth $2 if you spend $100 in the next 20 days, but we had already invested so much time and money that we decided to go with Temu for our furnishing anyway. My secretary said Alibaba might be a better option, but that sounded vaguely Arab which we can’t really be seen as supporting these days.” At press time, the mailroom was seen overflowing with hundreds of packages small and cheap enough to bypass American import restrictions.