Tough Professor Considers 90% Efficacy of COVID Vaccine a B+

WESTWOOD — Dr. Andrew Krossco took a bold stance against grade inflation on Monday when he reiterated his rule that the vaccine effectiveness cutoff for an A in his class is 95% instead of the traditional 90%. “Your other professors may have rewarded behavior like finishing the assignment two months before the WHO’s estimated end-of-the-year deadline,” continued Krossco, a professor of epidemiology at UCLA and author of the book How Participation Trophies Created Cancer. “But in the real world, slacking off will not be tolerated.” Krossco took the last five minutes of class to repeat that, just like professional scientists, all students must complete their work individually and refrain from looking at their peers’ papers.