HUNTINGTON BEACH, CA — Herb Matthew reached the pinnacle of his Facebook career Tuesday, after his latest rant struck the perfect balance between references to […]
WESTWOOD — After careful consideration of the evidence, we’re certain that your neighbor- the one saved in your phone as “Angus from Apartment 216”- only […]
You really thought you were out of here. How naïve you were, going on your Class Planner, just begging for a spot to open up […]
WESTWOOD — On her fifth call to the Ashe Center, second-year Natalie Johnson was able to secure a primary care appointment for December 2022. “I’m […]
FRAT ROW — Multiple eyewitness accounts came in last Thursday outside of Chi Alpha Theta regarding the romantic events of the thriving party inside. “Yeah, […]
WESTWOOD — When I arrived on the first day of rush, I was a man with a mission. It was my first time ever encountering […]
SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA — A recent report found that 70% of balding men also reported hair loss in the pubic region. “For a lot of us, […]
NEW YORK — This past week, recruiters at a Goldman Sachs information session were caught using the same image of a woman twice on a […]
WESTWOOD — Henry Bones, assistant professor within UCLA’s anthropology department, was denied tenure this weekend after a student got him so good with a “ligma” […]
WESTWOOD — Early Thursday afternoon, 17 year-old Connor Adams recited a perfectly memorized monologue to his psychiatrist in hopes of obtaining an Adderall prescription. “Hi, […]
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