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student life

Gene Block Accused of Cutting Corners

December 15, 2022 Elena Whitlock 0

Speaker On Bruinwalk To Blast “Pre-Med Pre-Health?” Every Ten Seconds

November 11, 2022 Blue Flood 0

WESTWOOD — This Monday, at the peak of rush hour on Bruinwalk, a speaker programmed to blast “Pre-med? Pre-health?” made its debut in front of […]

Opinion: How Can I Help The Homeless If They Don’t Have Venmo?

June 16, 2022 Cash Freeman 0

Yesterday, I was walking back to campus after enjoying a delicious $15 salad at Tendergreens when a homeless man looked right into my eyes and […]

North Campus Students Enjoy First Week of Summer

June 7, 2022 Max Flora 0

WESTWOOD — UCLA students majoring in the humanities and social sciences have reportedly been enjoying their first week of summer, which as far as they […]

UCLA Frat Issues Notes App Apology for Alleged Serial Sexual Assault

May 31, 2022 Azalea Morris 0

WESTWOOD — On Monday, a UCLA Fraternity was cornered into finally addressing their countless sexual assault allegations. Their method of addressing this serious issue was […]

Archaeologists Discover First Woman To Ever Put “Future Milf” In Her Tinder Bio

May 12, 2022 Blue Flood 0

WESTWOOD — A team of UCLA archaeologists announced Monday that, after years of digging, they have uncovered the first woman to ever write “future milf” […]

Mom Who Gave You Eating Disorder Has No Idea Why Everyone In Therapy These Days

May 10, 2022 Tatiana Davidson 0

LOS ANGELES — On Saturday evening, your mother who definitely gave you an eating disorder announced her disbelief at the number of your friends who […]

Student Requesting Extension Types Transcript of Recent Therapy Session In Email

April 21, 2022 Melissa Beining 0

WESTWOOD — Third-year political science major Jeffrey Trabor included the transcript of his recent therapy session in an email to his TA requesting an extension. […]

Oops, Grandma Ate A Plastic Egg And Now We’re Praying For A Second Resurrection

April 19, 2022 Melissa Beining 0

USC MEDICAL CENTER — Bringing a tragic end to a day of religious festivities, Grandma ate a plastic egg, and now we’re asking God in […]

Anonymous Invasive Carp Destroys Google Docs Ecosystem

April 12, 2022 Jade Lacy 0

GOOGLE DRIVE — Digital climate scientists announced Friday that the ecosystem of anonymous life forms that populate the Google Docs microbiome is being threatened by […]

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