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“Sperm Racing” Event To Take Place In Communal Bathroom Shower Stall

April 25, 2025 Zach Fischer 0

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I Lived It: The Corner I Was Going To Stand In At The Party Got Taken

As a Mysterious Fella, it’s important for me to have a nice corner to stand in at parties. There’s really nothing like holding a clammy […]
Report: White Woman Lowkey Doesn’t Mind The Patriarchy

BEVERLY HILLS— Maddie Rose Miller, a fourth-year Sociology major, CorePower Yoga instructor, and aspiring luxury real estate agent, has recently reported feeling no ill-will towards […]
Opinion: No, I Will Not Pie You On Bruinwalk, Please Don’t Involve Me In Your Fetishes

Just the other day, I was walking to campus, my fresh, virgin eyes bright and cheery, excited to see the world and all the glory […]
White Boy With Asian Girlfriend Too Excited To Celebrate AAPI Month

WESTWOOD — After making yet another joke about “sucking balls” while ordering boba, first-year Global Studies major Brayden Smith made an Instagram post where he […]
Embarrassing! Student Doesn’t Have Outfit For Victorian French Gothic Hyperpop Themed Fundrager

WESTWOOD — This weekend, civil engineering freshman James Baeseck was humiliated as he failed to show up in theme to the unsustainable fashion club’s Victorian […]

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Opinion: No, I Will Not Pie You On Bruinwalk, Please Don’t Involve Me In Your Fetishes
Opinion: The Ackerman Third Floor Gay Cruising Space Should Be A Designated Cultural Heritage Site
Five Reasons Why I Didn’t Ruin The Vibe By Throwing Up In De Neve

Ashe Center To Offer Gender Affirming Computer Science Degrees
Local Centaur Divided Hot Dog Style
Time Flies: 2005 Baby Officially Queer Elder

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