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roommates

Seven Deadly Sins Revised To Include Not Refilling The Brita

January 19, 2022 Melissa Beining 0

VATICAN CITY — The Holy Roman Catholic Church announced on Tuesday that the Seven Deadly Sins will be revised to include Not Refilling the Brita. […]

Bomb Threat? Roommate’s Text About Cleaning Has An Exclamation Point

December 18, 2021 Gabby Bromberg 0

WESTWOOD — Tensions reached an unprecedented high Saturday when third-year Maya Hernandez received a text from her roommate saying, “Heyyy, let’s wipe down the counter […]

Opinion: Your Sleeping Roommate Doesn’t Matter

November 4, 2021 Anonymous Roommate 0

You’ve woken up bright and early. 7:50 am on a Tuesday. You cast a glance at your smug roommate in their immaculate fortress of fluff […]

Point: Wash Your Dishes / Counterpoint: I’m Letting Them Soak

April 23, 2019 Griffin Stout 0

Point: Wash Your Dishes By Alex Haru, Kellen Loke, Drew Casebier We’ve called this roommate meeting to discuss the issue of the dishes that have […]

Roommate Cooks Pasta Again

November 4, 2018 Nathan Glovinsky 0

WESTWOOD — Returning home from a late evening class, third-year Biology major Ashley Barton is confirmed to have cooked pasta once again. “I like rigatoni,” […]

Roommate Found Online Starting To Show Some Red Flags

September 3, 2018 Nathan Glovinsky 0

SAN DIEGO, CA — After thinking about it some more, incoming freshman Kayla Marker has begun to cast some doubt on her roommate selection choice following […]

Report: Milk Bad For Sure Now

May 23, 2018 Saniya Anand 0

WESTWOOD — Tentatively sniffing the half-gallon jug, fourth-year English major Jenny Wong concluded that the milk was bad for sure now. “It tasted kinda off […]

Local Roommate’s Tinder No Longer Ironic

March 26, 2018 Nathan Glovinsky 0

WESTWOOD — Earlier this week, area woman Becca Corkin officially changed her stance on the nature of her roommate’s Tinder usage. “I think it started off […]

Report: Dishes Still There

March 26, 2018 Nathan Glovinsky 0

WESTWOOD — According to a recent scientific study published by your roommates, findings verified that your dishes are still there. “After observing empirical data and […]

Rhythmic Sounds Coming From Roommate’s Bed

November 22, 2015 Isaac Williams 0

WESTWOOD — Late Wednesday evening, third year Electrical Engineering student Devin Thacker reported hearing loud, rhythmic sounds coming from the bed of his roommate, Tanner […]

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